Part 1.
How I push myself...
Sometimes, we know that everybody has their dreams. Many of them keep fighting to get their dreams, it is same as me. Well the most thing I will always remember is when I was always fighting and never giving up, just only to get what I wanted. I pushed and dared myself to fight my doubt, fear, and my nervousness ( though this one was the hardest one) by joining myself in the competition of German Olympiade in last December 2017. I got noticed from my friends, BEST FRIENDS, and also my NEIGHBORS!!! They( my friends or even besties) kept saying " dasar lu ambis banget dew ( you're very ambitious) " was not it a compliment? Huh, for me it was yes, but they said that with another means and ways and many times, so I thought that it teased me alot. And there were some peple said " what for you studied harder? Girls would be at home, they should take care of their children and be housewife".For me, it sounded like it fell down my spirit and my reliance. I also ever wouldnt study to prepare it, why? Because I was so in bad mood when I heard that they would call me "ambitious" or they would asked me why I didnt continue my study and kept being ambitious when I joined with them. So did it make me stop and keep acting in fake way that I would not care to keep studying harder to get my dreams? SERIOUSLY I EVER DID IT, I ever tried to feel like a chill person and I acted like I wouldn't think too much, but I SERIOUSLY DIDN'T FEEL ENJOY. So what did I do then? I tried to find what's my aim to live, and I kept doing what made me enjoy, what I could believe by the process to get my dreams or something that I wanted to get. I know the people who claimed me like that and acted like, they actually had dreams. But why did they should keep claiming people who always try to work harder just to get their dream. BRUH EVERY PERSON IS TOTALLY DIFFERENT. YOU guys can't judge or claim them when they try to work just to get their dreams, every person has the way to reach their dreams.
At that time when I had some tests for German Olympiade, I felt so nervous, but back to what I have dared and pushed myself to be "SELF CONFIDENT", and when the result time came, I felt so nervous now with my result, but I kept praying and believing with my process, and........ THERE WAS MY NAME. I was called to be the 2nd winner, seriously I had never thought that I could pass it and got what I really wanted, felt unbelieve and my face and heart were full of tears, though I got many claims from others, mainly people who were near with me. And then what's after that????
Started from my best friends, friends, and my neighbours too (only some lol) they came to me and congratulated me. I felt happy, but there was a little thing that made me to feel so revolted. What was it??? There were some people said that how lucky I was, so I could apply to snmptn, and well a higher step to be accepted by snmptn (well it couldnt ensure, because it depended on your luckyness too), and some said " ah you were so lucky, if me? I didnt have any experiences, certificates like that" and still more.Well guys, you didnt know how much I were being so damn tired and stressed, some people only looked at the results, without knowing how much the struggles that we had passed, the result that I got was from my ambition and my pressure of being called ambitious and you claimed :), the important things were becaused of your hard working and praying!!! For people who still think that girls should be a housewife, well guys!! Open your mind. We deserve a job and we deserve to do what we want as long as in the positive and good ways. And for people who always get claim like that dont worry you are not alone guys, successful person needs many claims, judgements, also struggles, but the point is they never giving up!!! No matter how much you have fell down, how much you've failed, how much time and money you have spent to rech your dreams. But believe me, you guys deserve your dreams!!! As long as you dont forget to keep working harder, believing, and praying! Cheers
CHASE YOUR BEAUTIFUL DREAMS WITHOUT STOP FOR HARD WORKING AND KEEP BELIEVING.
